Does this sound familiar?
The alarm goes off on Monday morning and instantly you are filled with dread. Your thoughts immediately turn to how much sleep you didn’t get, how the weekend went by too fast, and how you need to drag yourself to the coffee pot so you can get ready for the day.
By the time you get to work, you are strategizing about how to make the week go by faster so that you can just get to Friday.
Then, when Friday comes you are completely exhausted and numb. The weekend is finally here but you have so much to get caught up on that you aren’t sure where to even start.
Then Sunday evening rolls around and you get the familiar knot in your stomach because you know you just have to do the same routine over again next week.
And then you do it over and over again until you you die! ☠️
Ok, I added a little dramatic flair to the end, but if you’ve read this far you can probably relate.
This used to be my life. I felt so trapped because I couldn’t see how to do things differently. It seemed like this is what everyone around me was doing.
I was so unhappy, and like most unhappy stories, the protagonist has to hit rock bottom before they decide it’s time to change.
I was sick and tired (literally) of living a life where I just white-knuckled it through the week so I could get to the weekend and then have the joy of the weekend taken from me because I was already dreading the week ahead.
The rock bottom tale is for another time, but it led me to a very important decision. I made a vow to make peace with Monday.
Building a life you love takes time
Making Peace with Monday didn’t happen overnight. It was about 3 years between the decision and a time when I felt like things had shifted enough to where I didn’t live for the weekends.
This adventure will look different for everyone, but here are some not-so-subtle tweaks you can begin to play with right away.
Forget about work-life balance.
This is one of the biggest lies that we are told. The idea that “work”, a.k.a. not fun, and “life”, a.k.a. everything else are diametrically opposed does not have to be true. If what you do for work feeds you instead of drains you, then all of it gets to be “life”. It gets to be a life that you love.
When I let go of the work-life balance myth I found so much freedom. Now I do things that make money, but it’s just a part of my life. I’m not tied to working during certain hours or on certain days. I rest when my body needs rest. I push forward when I have the energy and feel inspired to do so.
Self-care.
I know that my life, my family, and my business are going to be in shambles if I don’t take care of myself. When I was deep in the throes of my “before life” I heard people talk about self-care and all it did was piss me off. At that point, the idea of taking care of myself was another thing that I couldn’t possibly fit into my already jam-packed and exhausting life.
However, a global pandemic and a personal health crisis convinced me that maybe those annoying people were right. You actually can’t pour from an empty cup. One of the biggest needle movers in my “now life” has been my morning self-care practice. It looks a little different every day, but I make things like meditation, journaling, working with my oracle cards, and walking outside with my dog a priority.
I have to do this first thing in the morning or it will get away from me. I trained myself to get up earlier so that I could have those precious moments in peace while everyone else was still sleeping. It was the only way I could fit it all in before I had to go to work. Now that I am a full-time entrepreneur the habit has stuck with me even when I don’t need to leave the house by a certain time. That’s how important my self-care practice is to me.
Connection and Community.
One of the reasons that my “before life” was so challenging is that I felt disconnected. I felt like I was just going through the motions for 40 hours a week. I was spending a lot of time with people that didn’t know me very well. I was masking a lot of who I really was because I needed to fit in and not make waves.
It is hard to overstate how exhausting it is, both mentally and emotionally, to stay small and fit into boxes. It was no wonder I felt like I didn’t have anything left for the people that I truly did care about. My husband, my kids, and my closest friends got the worst of me because I was short-tempered and cranky all the time.
I began to spend more time doing the weird and quirky things that I covered up at work. I took an interest in energy healing and alternative spirituality and as soon as I started following the breadcrumbs of things I truly enjoyed, I found other people I truly connected with.
When you are floating through your days in a haze of disconnection, life naturally feels more meaningful. Having people in your circle who share your interests and genuinely care about you is essential to many aspects of your well-being.
Putting it all together
The way that I eventually made peace with Monday was by eventually leaving my 9 to 5. I started seeing clients for reiki and tarot readings in the evenings and on weekends long before I left my job. Eventually, I gained some momentum and got a few coaching certifications, and began seeing clients for longer term 1:1 coaching and teaching workshops.
Leaving behind my regular job was scary AF and to be honest with you, there are still times when I look around and think, what the hell and I doing? But I absolutely love the way my life is playing out.
There are still challenges, of course.
But now I live a life where if often forget what day of the week it is because most of my days are awesome.
I’m not pushing through so I can leave at 5:00. I’m not telling myself, “3 more days until Friday, you can do this” anymore.
I love going to the grocery store at 10:00 am on a Tuesday. I take a walk in the middle of the day if I feel like it. I make my life work for me. It’s the most amazing and liberating feeling.
This is what I want for everyone. We all have the right to make choices about how we spend our time. I know that entrepreneurship isn’t everyone’s path to liberation. There are a lot of folks who thrive in the structure of a 9 to 5 and that’s wonderful. It is possible to also live a life where you don’t dread Monday whether you have a regular j-o-b or not.
So, if you are a place where I was a few years ago and I am being the annoying person telling you to take care of yourself and do what you love…
I’m sorry AND you’re welcome.
Dig my vibe? ✌️
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